When other adults question us allowing our children to be exposed to a goth lifestyle [and they do], we know we don’t share their worries.

That [parents of goths will probably end up boasting about their son/daughter the doctor, lawyer or bank manager] is the surprising finding of Sussex University’s Dunja Brill, whose doctorate in media and cultural studies looked at people with funny hair and eyeliner in London, Brighton and Cologne, and who is herself a former goth.

“Most youth subcultures encourage people to drop out of school and do illegal things,” she says. “Most goths are well educated, however. They hardly ever drop out and are often the best pupils. The subculture encourages interest in classical education, especially the arts. I’d say goths are more likely to make careers in web design, computer programming … even journalism.”

Actually, having been part of the gothic culture for over 15 years [I was exposed to, but not immersed, before that time], I don’t think these findings should be surprising at all.  Most of the younger goths I’ve encountered have been the intellectuals of their time, discussing classic literature and foreign film the way others their age discuss Family Guy or the latest Angelina Jolie movie – not that we never enjoy these things, of course; we’re all individuals with individual likes and dislikes.  Even I enjoy the latest offerings of reality TV while reading Oscar Wilde or Ernest Hemingway. 

Jordan, a great student; despite his gothic upbringing or because of it?

Speaking with other Goth parents, I’m reassured that our kids aren’t the only good students sprouting from the dark soil of our culture.  I suspect it has almost as much to do with the philosophy of parenting as with the natural abilities of the kids.

Our friend David commented on our Facebook wall:

We expect [our daughter] to do well in school so that someday she can get into college and have a career. But, as I explained to her, that is so she can support herself and we don’t care what that career may be (although she is leaning toward engineering). We show both by words and actions that character, truthfulness, honor and being true to yourself are the most important things. Some people are obcessed with $ and I wonder how many today are training their daughters to marry a doctor or lawyer.

I hope we can agree that the happiness of an individual should define success more than the pricetag on their home or cars.

~sheila 

 As Scarlett O’Hara said, “Tomorrow is another day,” and well, here it is.    

Welcome back to our home. While last week, we showed you the initial entry way to our home, this week we will journey down ‘the hall’ to the kids’ rooms. Next week, Eric’s and my bedroom will be featured.    

Follow me down the hall to see where the gothlings dwell.

It is incredibly difficult to take good photos of the side wall in a narrow hallway when there is no opposing door to step into.  As you turn into the hall [to the right from the front entry] with your back to the cross and baby photo display, on your right is a trio of paintings that we quite love. We’re able to see them from the living room where we spend a lot of time.     

some of our favorite smaller paintings

Across the hall from the painting trio is a closet where we keep our more basic shelved needs.  Extra cold meds, bandages, sheets, and a few games. We are working on better organization to get the games out of there and into an area where we’ll use them more often. Next to the closet is a “den” which lately has become a storage room for items that just don’t fit anywhere else.  Extra school supplies, old magazines, books we’ve not thought about reading in a long time… You know, that stuff.      

Between the two doors is a wall panel with a small Day of the Dead painting as well as a heart shaped painting by Misty Benson.    

Day of the Dead meets Skelly Cats

 Next to the door to the den is the entry to the boys’ room.  On the wall panel between, we have a gorgeous shelf unit featureing another Living Dead Doll and a medal from the Women’s Relief Corps, dated 1883.     

Living Dead Doll with Civil War Medal

Close-up view of a Civil War Medal and the "pet" spider who has made her home on top.

 The boys’ room is next. They’ve asked for minimal photographs to be posted, so I just peeked in.  [I must admit, I was overjoyed with how clean it was. What mother would complain about the remote being the only thing on the floor?]   

A peek inside the boys' room

 On the length of hall across from the door to the boys’ room, we’ve showcased some family photos.  Why waste such a great wall?  

A wall of family history

 A smaller wall between the boys’ and girls’ rooms showcases a painting depicting Eve. 

Eve with her shiny apple

 The final stop on today’s tour is the girls’ room. Unlike their brothers, they are very excited to show it off.

They’ve decorated their door with Bella Morte and Teddy Scaresposters, as well as some artwork done by both Ravynn and Whisper and a Witch sign.  Of course, there is the required Hello Kitty door hanger.

The door to the girls' room

 Whisper’s bed on the left holds pillows and stuffies that are very special to her. A vintage ballerina painting and ballet shoes are favorites.

Whisper's space with special stuffies and pillows - one she got from my father.

 Also on the shelf over her bed are three sweet little ballerinas.

Whisper's ballerinas with a Nightmare Before Christmas toy peeking through.

Ravynn’s bed has even more pillows and stuffies. She also has a painting of a wee faerie hiding in a forest of mushrooms over her bed.

Ravynn's space

A closeup of one of Ravynn’s favorite stuffies. She took this photo to show off the bear she posed with in one of her first Bats! meow… photo shoots.

The bear I promised Ravynn would show up in the tour images.

A shelf near the foot of Ravynn’s bed holds more ballerinas, faeries, and Hello Kitty.  It really is a very girlie place.

Ravynn's shelf with so much girlie stuff

A shelf next to the door holds more dolls standing in front of an Ayria poster. Whisper was proud of this photo she snapped.

Porcelain dolls keep watch next to the door

And finally, Grandmother Spider keeps hold of their dreams as they sleep.  She hangs from the light in the middle of the ceiling in the middle of a ribbon web.

A very large dream catcher

Sitting with the kids tonight, I asked them what they think makes a successful adult.  Ravynn stated “someone who is polite and speaks nicely to people,” while Whisper’s definition was “someone who is loving and kind.”  I was pleased that they are absorbing what I want to teach them and hope we continue along this road together. 

This advice from Thoreau sums up many of my hopes:

Each second we live is a new and unique moment of the universe, a moment that will never be again  And what do we teach our children? We teach them that two and two make four, and that Paris is the capital of France. When will we also teach them what they are?

We should say to each of them: Do you know what you are? You are a marvel. You are unique. In all the years that have passed, there has never been another child like you. Your legs, your arms, your clever fingers, the way you move. You may become a Shakespeare, a Michelangelo, a Beethoven. You have the capacity for anything.

If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away.

- Henry David Thoreau

I sit now, wondering how to teach someone WHAT THEY ARE.  Not easy, but I’m committed. At least to leading them to the path of discovery and allowing them to find the truth for themselves.

I hope to see more parents with the same concerns.

~sheila

Naughty, Sheila.

For the next several weeks, I will invite you [each Sunday] to explore a new area of the house.  This will give me time to photograph each part adequately, but will also save you from sifting through a dozen photos in each sitting.  That does get old and, depending on your internet connection, could become really tedious.

PART 1: Welcome to the Schroeders

Friends at the front door welcome guests. Come on in.

After entering, you wait in our entry area. It’s mostly a short hallway. On the right side of the hall are two coat closets with a shelved cubby area between. On the left is a half bath and an entry to the kitchen.

The cubby area tends to be an area of special interest for family and friends.  It’s difficult to get a photo of it because of the width of the hallway.

The Cubby

 Shelf by shelf. 

The top shelf holds several of our Living Dead Dolls, large and small versions.

The top shelf

 The second shelf holds a few gargoyles, small ‘action figures’ from some of our favorite horror movies, a basket made by a friend of ours, and a Day of the Dead style candle holder.

The second shelf

 The third shelf holds some skulls [I wish I knew what they were from], candles, bottles, religious statuary [a cross and Confucius]

The third shelf

 The bottom shelf is also hard to photograph.  Each picture makes it look cluttered, but it’s not so much.  It holds more of our Living Dead Dolls, a cauldron, two smaller cauldrons/insense burners, candles, Ganesh, and items from our family Mabon ritual.

The bottom shelf, view 1

 An alternate view shows more of the Mabon items and candles.

The bottom shelf, view 2

 Wall by wall.

Directly across from the cubby hangs a print by the lovely NeNe Thomas, framed by two wrought iron wall sconces we’ve had for ages.

“]

Wall space, between the bathroom and the kitchen [angled toward the front door

“]

Wall space, between the kitchen and the living room [taken from the hall leading to the bedrooms

~sheila

In Beverly Lane, Eric plays a redneck zombie killer who shows up to help a small office full of people deal with the Zombie Apocalypse.

Goofing off between scenes.

Alek and I were labeled as Featured Zombies and spent an extra few days on the set causing mayhem. Oh, and goofing off between scenes.

We’re coming to get your braiiiiiiiiiiiiiins!

The movie was also covered in the local paper this morning. The article “Zombies Take Over Local Scrap Yard,” features photos of Eric and of Ravynn and Whisper.  Sadly, I can’t figure out how to copy them out from the website [because they want us to buy them]…

Now that filming is done, I’m back to website re-creation.  Writing product description copy makes my head hurt.  More on that later

~sheila

Initially, I was away with several sick kids.  We spent the 18th celebrating the Pip’s birthday at a local Mexican place.  It was a great time. Despite Jordan having been home sick that day with a bad stomach ache, he was feeling better and in a party mood.  The other kids were chipper and didn’t even fight over who got to sit next to Mama.  We laughed and sang together as the servers helped the birthday girl enjoy her special dessert.

Unfortunately, about an hour after we got home, three of the kids were complaining of the same stomach ache Jordan had earlier.  No other symptoms – just a pain that on more than one occasion had them laying on the floor yelling out in pain.  It was heartbreaking. Throughout the next week, we had kids home from school; one on the first day; two on the second; one on the third; I even got called to school several days to bring meds or to bring home sick children. It was a mess.  But, we’re done.  Whisper, the lucky birthday girl, never did catch whatever it was.  YEAH!!

Even after the recovery, it was easy to just stay away and not look for witty and interesting topics to talk about.  Naughty.

Although, I’ve not had much time for sewing, I have taken steps toward a new sachet design. I’m researching a design to embroider on the front of the sachet and then need to work on the smelly mix for inside.  Quite a change from what I normally favor, I’m looking toward a more ‘girly’ pink and green palette for this new item.  Mostly because of the color significances to go along with the aromatherapy, but the girls suggested it was about time. I’m looking forward to cutting and stitching.

And I need need need to spend time formatting the new shopping cart we’re using for the website.  I have a HARD deadline of March 25 [and yes, I know how soon that is!] so the site is ready for showing off and [ahem!] pimping by April 2.  We have plans in the works that have great potential for more traffic.  And our customers must be happy.

Cool, no? Good friends give on to others. They share the love and wealth and cupcakes. And so, the rules for this privilege are to:

• Copy and display the award on one’s blog.
• List who gave me the award and link to their blog.
• List 10 things that make me happy.
• Pass the award on to other bloggers and visit their blog to let them know.

Let’s see, things that make me happy:

1. Eric, my love and partner in crime.  We’ve been together forever, but those hugs still fix what ails me.
2. The monsters [Jordan, Alek, Ravynn, & Whisper] and the music of their laughter.
3. Mail with stamps – cards, letters, invitations, postcards.
4. Crashing through a roadblock in my genealogy research or finding new-to-me old family photos.
5. Finishing a new product design and pattern and showing it off
6. Moose tracks ice cream on an almost hot summer day.
7. Exploring old cemeteries.
8. Snuggling under the blankets ALL DAY on a Saturday and watching movies I’ve already seen 100 times.
9. Knowing that, if only for a few minutes, all of the laundry in the house is clean, folded and put away.
10. Being able to drive with the windows open for the first time each spring.

And for the blogs, I nominate and recommend:

La Vida Dulce

Crush Mix Blend

Smarter than Pancakes

Mommy’ s Journey

First up are a couple of new dresses or, maybe skirt and top sets.  The way this usually works is I determine what my girls want and then sew for them.  If the design is a success [as determined by the ooos and aaahs of the 6- and 7-years old girls  in the house and in the neighborhood], we’ll photograph, do the price workups [cost versus profit], create the web listing, and work on alternate size options – not necessarily in that order.

Next up are a set of rag dolls.  Or something of that nature.  I’m super excited about this.  When I was a little girl, all of my baby dolls [and I had a LOT of baby dolls with ALL the accessories] were little blonde things with bobbed hair.  They didn’t look anything like their mama.  Even the baby dolls in our house are 90% blondes. I do believe it’s time to expand the market to include more of the ‘looks like me’ variety.  Of course, there is more in the plans than just brown hair and grey eyes.  I’ll share more as soon as something has been sewn and stuffed. I’m really looking forward to this!

Finally, I want to incorporate my love of quilting into our designs.  More housewares, some quilts for babies, even some pillows for bigger kids and adults.  But not just any design will do – we’ll need something special, so more designing on real life graph paper.

So much to do.  Such great plans.  But time, again, is the enemy.

~sheila

I made one for Ravynn when she was 2. She wore it until Whisper grew into it and Whisper wore it until she couldn’t. Now, that very dress is hanging in my fabric storage closest ready to be pulled out and used for inspiration.  When I feel my energy level slipping or when I’ve clearly overloaded my schedule and simply need the reminder that “Your children love what you do and who you are.  Carry on Mum,” I hold it in my hands and I feel stronger, better, more determined.

I want to sew for the girls [and the boys], but I have pending orders [note the Wednesday dress I just mentioned] to finish and ship.  I also have website updates to finish and discuss with my designer.  There are minor updates needed to Etsy and ArtFire.  And I have sketches for more designs  that I desperately want to mock up a pattern of and get ready to promote.

But first things first, so tomorrow I will complete the dress.

Maybe after that, I’ll photograph the sewing studio to share with my bloggy friends.

The day started with a drive out to Camp Chesterfield for the tea reading seminar.  I’ve never read tea leaves, but I really want to!  So, I’m hunting for loose tea through a couple of websites that were suggested by friends.  I’ve spent some time looking at Stash Tea and Special Teas is next! I’m also hunting down tea cups with plain white interiors on Ebay. I’ve found I set that I like and I’m waiting for an answer from the seller about the inside.

There wasn’t a great depth of information provided at the seminar, but there was enough that I’ll feel comfortable giving it a go once I have everything I need.  The process for the readings is fairly simple:

• Brew a HOT pot of tea with loose tea
• Pour a cup
• Drink most of it.  Sipping the tea will allow your aura to infuse with the tea and will give a proper reading.
• When the tea is mostly gone and there are dregs showing in the bottom, hold the cup in your left hand and swirl it three times.
• Place the saucer upside down over the cup and flip it all together and all at once, so the cup is sitting upside down on the saucer [which is right-side up].
• Turn the cup three times and end it with the handle facing you/the reader.
• Lift the cup and explore the patterns left by the leaves.

The suggestion was to use a cup with a white interior so the leaves are easier to see.  Patterns on the left of the cup indicate the past; patterns near the rim indicate the present/near future.  Dark leaves indicate a man; light leaves indicate a woman.

I need to do more research to learn the meaning of specific symbols. I’d hoped the class would touch on that more, but it didn’t.

What the class did focus on was the importance of drinking tea for health – both physical and emotional.  The mention of tea parties for children brought back lovely memories of sitting in the living room at my grandmother’s home with my Aunt Lois.  She drank tea ALL the time and made cups for my sisters and I when we went to visit – which was quite often as we were lucky enough to live across the street.  We sat and drank tea while we watched Grandma crochet or put together puzzles.

Grandma Rounds

Aunt Lois taught us to embroider and let us help her with projects. Now I have to wonder exactly how much help we were   The tea seminar really reminded me of those days, which was nice.  We lost Grandma in 1979 and lost Aunt Lois in the summer of 2008.  I always think of them when I have a strong black tea.  I will continue to do so.

After we came  home, we had bags of loot to sort – BAGS.  I attempted to take photos in order to share the before and after [as many of these items will become one-of-a-kind items for Bats! meow...] but I hit some strange combination of buttons on my camera which changed the options to Black & White photos.  You really need to see the color on these! So after I call customer service and get that straightened out, I’ll be able to share!  As we were digging through the old costumes, we checked the tags and waistbands for the ever-present name in Sharpie ink that told us who they used to belong to.  Some of these clothes belonged to girls who were smaller than Ravynn and Whisper when we met them.  Eric and I started working with the studio in 1988, when he was a college freshman. We entertained the kids for hours with stories of when their ballet teachers were little and with descriptions of past choreography.

The evening ended with the Grammys.  Normally, we skip them.  This year,  however, Whisper had begged us for days to pick up 3D glasses at Target and we were ready for the Michael Jackson tribute.  I was pleased that they were broadcasting expected air times for performances as the show progressed.  10pm…  almost two hours past the girls’ bedtime and an hour past the boys’.  With a quick reminder that they’d have to get up for school with NO complaints, we agreed to let them stay up. I joked on my personal Facebook profile that I was ‘the worst mother ever,’ but I’m glad we made the decision we did. Instead of watching covers of his more successful songs, we were treated to a celebration of his humanitarian efforts. I cried. I did.  Whisper did too.  She didn’t know who he was prior to his passing, but has since become his biggest fan – even asking for an MJ birthday party in February.  Because of her tears, she snuggled up onto my lap and sat for a few extra minutes and was treated to seeing his two oldest children accept an award on his behalf.  Children should not lose their parents so young.  Everyone felt that.

This morning the girls hopped out of bed while the boys dragged their way through the morning [much like mama!] and I treated them to some music during breakfast.  We listened to Michael because his CD was in the CD player.  As we waiting outside for the bus, Whisper looked up at me and said, “The next time I hear ,Remember the Time,’ I’m going to dance because it’s good to remember and we should be happy when we remember love.”

Remember. And dance.

~sheila