As Scarlett O’Hara said, “Tomorrow is another day,” and well, here it is.    

Welcome back to our home. While last week, we showed you the initial entry way to our home, this week we will journey down ‘the hall’ to the kids’ rooms. Next week, Eric’s and my bedroom will be featured.    

Follow me down the hall to see where the gothlings dwell.

It is incredibly difficult to take good photos of the side wall in a narrow hallway when there is no opposing door to step into.  As you turn into the hall [to the right from the front entry] with your back to the cross and baby photo display, on your right is a trio of paintings that we quite love. We’re able to see them from the living room where we spend a lot of time.     

some of our favorite smaller paintings

Across the hall from the painting trio is a closet where we keep our more basic shelved needs.  Extra cold meds, bandages, sheets, and a few games. We are working on better organization to get the games out of there and into an area where we’ll use them more often. Next to the closet is a “den” which lately has become a storage room for items that just don’t fit anywhere else.  Extra school supplies, old magazines, books we’ve not thought about reading in a long time… You know, that stuff.      

Between the two doors is a wall panel with a small Day of the Dead painting as well as a heart shaped painting by Misty Benson.    

Day of the Dead meets Skelly Cats

 Next to the door to the den is the entry to the boys’ room.  On the wall panel between, we have a gorgeous shelf unit featureing another Living Dead Doll and a medal from the Women’s Relief Corps, dated 1883.     

Living Dead Doll with Civil War Medal

Close-up view of a Civil War Medal and the "pet" spider who has made her home on top.

 The boys’ room is next. They’ve asked for minimal photographs to be posted, so I just peeked in.  [I must admit, I was overjoyed with how clean it was. What mother would complain about the remote being the only thing on the floor?]   

A peek inside the boys' room

 On the length of hall across from the door to the boys’ room, we’ve showcased some family photos.  Why waste such a great wall?  

A wall of family history

 A smaller wall between the boys’ and girls’ rooms showcases a painting depicting Eve. 

Eve with her shiny apple

 The final stop on today’s tour is the girls’ room. Unlike their brothers, they are very excited to show it off.

They’ve decorated their door with Bella Morte and Teddy Scaresposters, as well as some artwork done by both Ravynn and Whisper and a Witch sign.  Of course, there is the required Hello Kitty door hanger.

The door to the girls' room

 Whisper’s bed on the left holds pillows and stuffies that are very special to her. A vintage ballerina painting and ballet shoes are favorites.

Whisper's space with special stuffies and pillows - one she got from my father.

 Also on the shelf over her bed are three sweet little ballerinas.

Whisper's ballerinas with a Nightmare Before Christmas toy peeking through.

Ravynn’s bed has even more pillows and stuffies. She also has a painting of a wee faerie hiding in a forest of mushrooms over her bed.

Ravynn's space

A closeup of one of Ravynn’s favorite stuffies. She took this photo to show off the bear she posed with in one of her first Bats! meow… photo shoots.

The bear I promised Ravynn would show up in the tour images.

A shelf near the foot of Ravynn’s bed holds more ballerinas, faeries, and Hello Kitty.  It really is a very girlie place.

Ravynn's shelf with so much girlie stuff

A shelf next to the door holds more dolls standing in front of an Ayria poster. Whisper was proud of this photo she snapped.

Porcelain dolls keep watch next to the door

And finally, Grandmother Spider keeps hold of their dreams as they sleep.  She hangs from the light in the middle of the ceiling in the middle of a ribbon web.

A very large dream catcher

Our family isn’t typical…

My boys dance.  Eric guest performs. Jordan studied for 7 years. Alek still does. Most recently, he appeared as Harlequin in our local production of the Nutcracker.  He’s very talented and we’re very proud of him. They began dancing when they were 4 and have worked hard at one of the best studios in the Midwest.  When Ravynn turned 4, the boys came to me concerned. She wanted to take ballet, too, but they worried that it was only for boys [never mind that their classes had always been full of girls].  They were incredibly pleased when we bought a tiny pair of pink ballet shoes.  It wasn’t until a minor incident in 4th grade when they felt the bullying effects of being different.  A very kind teacher explained what exactly was the problem with the phrase ‘ballerina boy’ and it mostly ended. There are still comments flung around, but Alek who’s 12 and in 7th grade is strong and ignores them. 

Our family is goth.  Locally, we’re semi-famous for it, but you may have noticed from other comments or photos or even the About page associated with this blog.  Eric and I embrace being different, but each of the kids have at points heard rumors or fielded snotty comments based on how we look or dress.  It’s a great opportunity to talk to them about stereotypes and prejudice and about not having to conform to make other people happy.  For the most part they get it, but I understand [having been a 10 year old girl once upon a time] that there is still a sting involved.  I hate that.  At the same time they love when their friends think we’re cool because of the way we dress or the music we listen to.  I kinda like being famous at the elementary school, but not to the detriment of my kids.

When I read news stories about bullied kids or hear about it from fellow moms, my heart aches.  No child should have an unhappy childhood.  I mean there are some situations that cannot be avoided and the pain of them cannot be minimized, but… if the pain is caused by other kids or adults being hateful and unaccepting.  Well, the simple fact is that should be easy to change.

Several weeks ago, a Facebook post brought my attention to the blog, Portrait of an Adoption. Young Katie was being teased for wanting to carry a Star Wars water bottle to school.  Three cheers for social networking.  Geek Girls came out in force to support Katie. As I understand, Geeks, Nerds, and Dorks all came out to support her and give her strength.  I think this is awesome!  It’s what I’ve tried to teach my own kids.  Differences should be Celebrated. Sometimes they are, as with Katie’s situation.

Checking on Portrait of an Adoption, I read the story of author Cheryl Kilodavis and her book My Princess Boy. Her website explains it as:

My Princess Boy is a nonfiction picture book about acceptance. It tells the tale of a 4-year-old boy who happily expresses his authentic self by enjoying “traditional girl” things like jewelry, sparkles or anything pink. It is designed to start and continue a dialogue about unconditional friendship and teaches children — and adults — how to accept and support children for who they are and how they wish to look.

The response she is getting isn’t near as positive as Katie’s mother found for her.  Now, it isn’t all negative and maybe I”m experiencing emotional reactions to the negative comments that I do see.  I’ve been in the same place. People have, over the years, explained to me that it’s not ‘normal’ for boys to study dance or to have long hair [Eric does and Alek did until he cut and donated it in the summer of 2009]; I’ve been told that it’s not normal for them to do these things because society believes them to be ‘for girls’.  Somehow along the line it became acceptable for girls to want to do ‘boy things’, yet not for boys to want to do ‘girl things’.  I suggest we let kids do kid things and leave it at that.

I’ve fought the good fight for my kids. Cheryl is fighting for hers.

I encourage you to honor acceptance for everyone and embrace diversity in your own life today.

The day started with a drive out to Camp Chesterfield for the tea reading seminar.  I’ve never read tea leaves, but I really want to!  So, I’m hunting for loose tea through a couple of websites that were suggested by friends.  I’ve spent some time looking at Stash Tea and Special Teas is next! I’m also hunting down tea cups with plain white interiors on Ebay. I’ve found I set that I like and I’m waiting for an answer from the seller about the inside.

There wasn’t a great depth of information provided at the seminar, but there was enough that I’ll feel comfortable giving it a go once I have everything I need.  The process for the readings is fairly simple:

• Brew a HOT pot of tea with loose tea
• Pour a cup
• Drink most of it.  Sipping the tea will allow your aura to infuse with the tea and will give a proper reading.
• When the tea is mostly gone and there are dregs showing in the bottom, hold the cup in your left hand and swirl it three times.
• Place the saucer upside down over the cup and flip it all together and all at once, so the cup is sitting upside down on the saucer [which is right-side up].
• Turn the cup three times and end it with the handle facing you/the reader.
• Lift the cup and explore the patterns left by the leaves.

The suggestion was to use a cup with a white interior so the leaves are easier to see.  Patterns on the left of the cup indicate the past; patterns near the rim indicate the present/near future.  Dark leaves indicate a man; light leaves indicate a woman.

I need to do more research to learn the meaning of specific symbols. I’d hoped the class would touch on that more, but it didn’t.

What the class did focus on was the importance of drinking tea for health – both physical and emotional.  The mention of tea parties for children brought back lovely memories of sitting in the living room at my grandmother’s home with my Aunt Lois.  She drank tea ALL the time and made cups for my sisters and I when we went to visit – which was quite often as we were lucky enough to live across the street.  We sat and drank tea while we watched Grandma crochet or put together puzzles.

Grandma Rounds

Aunt Lois taught us to embroider and let us help her with projects. Now I have to wonder exactly how much help we were   The tea seminar really reminded me of those days, which was nice.  We lost Grandma in 1979 and lost Aunt Lois in the summer of 2008.  I always think of them when I have a strong black tea.  I will continue to do so.

After we came  home, we had bags of loot to sort – BAGS.  I attempted to take photos in order to share the before and after [as many of these items will become one-of-a-kind items for Bats! meow...] but I hit some strange combination of buttons on my camera which changed the options to Black & White photos.  You really need to see the color on these! So after I call customer service and get that straightened out, I’ll be able to share!  As we were digging through the old costumes, we checked the tags and waistbands for the ever-present name in Sharpie ink that told us who they used to belong to.  Some of these clothes belonged to girls who were smaller than Ravynn and Whisper when we met them.  Eric and I started working with the studio in 1988, when he was a college freshman. We entertained the kids for hours with stories of when their ballet teachers were little and with descriptions of past choreography.

The evening ended with the Grammys.  Normally, we skip them.  This year,  however, Whisper had begged us for days to pick up 3D glasses at Target and we were ready for the Michael Jackson tribute.  I was pleased that they were broadcasting expected air times for performances as the show progressed.  10pm…  almost two hours past the girls’ bedtime and an hour past the boys’.  With a quick reminder that they’d have to get up for school with NO complaints, we agreed to let them stay up. I joked on my personal Facebook profile that I was ‘the worst mother ever,’ but I’m glad we made the decision we did. Instead of watching covers of his more successful songs, we were treated to a celebration of his humanitarian efforts. I cried. I did.  Whisper did too.  She didn’t know who he was prior to his passing, but has since become his biggest fan – even asking for an MJ birthday party in February.  Because of her tears, she snuggled up onto my lap and sat for a few extra minutes and was treated to seeing his two oldest children accept an award on his behalf.  Children should not lose their parents so young.  Everyone felt that.

This morning the girls hopped out of bed while the boys dragged their way through the morning [much like mama!] and I treated them to some music during breakfast.  We listened to Michael because his CD was in the CD player.  As we waiting outside for the bus, Whisper looked up at me and said, “The next time I hear ,Remember the Time,’ I’m going to dance because it’s good to remember and we should be happy when we remember love.”

Remember. And dance.

~sheila